Treatments for Social Anxiety

Cognitive Therapy

The way you think directly effects the way you feel and behave. Thoughts lead to feelings which lead to behaviour. Positive thoughts lead to positive feelings and positive behaviour. Negative or irrational thoughts lead to negative feelings and behaviour.

Types of irrational thoughts

Black and white thinking – also referred to as “All or nothing” thinking – is when you think things are all one way or another and there is no middle ground.

Overgeneralisation – is when you assume that because you’ve had one bad experience that it will always happen. Includes words such as always, never, noone, everyone.

Labelling – calling yourself or others names.

Mental filter – when you only see the negative in life and ignore the positive.

Magnification and minimisation– you magnify your bad qualities or the bad things that happen and minimise the good qualities or good things that happen.

Personalisation – you blame yourself for the reason something happened or the way someone acted.

Mind reading – you assume you know what someone else is thinking about you.

Fortune telling – you predict a negative outcome before something has even happened.

Emotional reasoning – judging things based on your feelings, ie, that because you feel a certain way you concluded that you are that way.

Should statements – also includes ‘must’,’ have to’ – when you assume that yourself or things have to be perfect. 

Catastrophisation – assuming the worst outcome about things, which leads to panic. Usually preceded by the words “What if??”

Whenever you find yourself thinking irrationally it will help if you see things more clearly by not using this way of thinking. First you identify the feeling you are having, then the thought that this came from, write it down, then you need to challenge the thought and replace it with a more rational statement.

Challenging questions to ask

What is the evidence for this?
Is this always true?
Has this been true in the past?
What are the odds of this really happening?
What is the very worst that could happen? What is so bad about that? What would I do if the worst happens?
Am I looking at the whole picture?
Am I being fully objective?

Words to avoid

Cant – use can
Should – use would or could
Always and never – use sometimes, often
Labels – instead, describe the action not the person
What if – use so what? Or I’ll handle it! instead

Affirmations

Once you have your rational statement you can repeat it to yourself every day as an affirmation. An affirmation is a statement that you repeat to yourself over and over. You probably are used to negative affirmations such as ‘Nobody likes me’. Now you need to learn about positive affirmations and start rerecording the tapes of your mind.

Rules for affirmations

Personal – make sure it applies to you.

Positive – don’t include the words not or no longer.

Present tense – say it as if it already is true.

Summary

You control the thoughts you think – don’t let your thoughts control you!! When you are feeling anxious, identify what you were thinking, recognise the irrational parts of it, challenge the thoughts, and change the thought to a positive, rational one. Then you can repeat the new thought or affirmation so you can reprogram the negative tapes inside your mind.